*Karma*

I have spent the last year fretting and moaning and doubting myself and my decision to go to graduate school. I have even gone so far as to say that I wish someone would give me permission to quit.  Despite all of the negativity I put around the experience, I finished two semesters and four classes with all A's. I finally accepted that "I got this!" I was looking forward to fall classes and a new attitude about this part of my journey.  I even enrolled for 3 classes instead of the 2 that are required!

And then Karma stepped in and gave me a great big kick in the butt!

Early in the summer I learned the grant that funds my position was drastically cut at the State level. The trickle down meant that changes would have to be made within the organization where I work. Fast forward through weeks of agony and wondering what was going to happen to my job and the jobs of several co-workers. I finally got the call that my position would be cut from full-time to part-time effective August 1st.

AND THERE IT WAS!!! The excuse to quit school was handed to me.

The only problem is that I no longer want to quit.  I now find myself in a position where I have to consider whether or not I can afford to work part-time and pay for school. While I will have more time to focus on school and my practicum, I also have to consider the (significant) financial implications.

I am still processing this change so I am not going to try and put all of my thoughts about it in this post. What I really wanted to post about is the power of karma. What you put out in the universe becomes part of your journey. I surrounded myself with negativity and doubt for way too long. Even though I had adjusted my attitude and embraced the opportunity, I still had all of that nastiness "out there."   You can't un-do these things. Begin your day with a purpose to live in the moment and know that every experience is a bump on the path. I am responsible for how I proceed on my journey and I am determined to stay focused on the big picture.

I am putting my big girl panties on, talking to the financial aid office at WSU, and re-configuring our budget at home.

I can throw in the towel right now and feel justified in doing it. But karma be dammed, "I got this!"